Balls (pronounced: bawls)

Built FORD Tough. I present you the 2010 Hennessey Ford F-150 SVT Raptor VelociRaptor 500. With a 5.4 liter v-8 engine, producing massive quantities of power, 501 horsepower at 5100 rpm, and 520 lbs of torque at 3200 rpm, this monster can go zero to sixty in 5.6 seconds and a quarter mile in 14.1 seconds at 97 miles per hour! Unbelievable. Those speeds rival mid-level sports coupes. That is exactly why I propose that Ford changes its logo from Built FORD Tough to Built FORD Gay. Yeah, you heard me Ford.

My initial reaction to reading these numbers was this.
Yes. I googled the "purpose of trucks" since I knew google has all the answers in the world. Unfortunately google did not supply the "purpose of trucks". Instead, they gave me endless links to truck for sale, truck-king, truck tires, trucker hats, truck drivers wanted, trunks, tree trunks, dual purpose hand trucks, purpose wrecker sales, etc. Therefore, in my infinite wisdom and knowledge, I decided to define the purpose of trucks myself.

The truck is constructed of three parts: the cabin, the flatbed, and the engine/drive-train/wheels/etc. Lets begin with the flatbed. The purpose of the flatbed is to carry loads of whatever material that the truck driver (who will be seated in the cabin) needs. The cabin exists to keep the truck driver safe during collisions and sheltered during stormy weather. It also allows the driver to keep their possessions in a safer, less open place than the bed. The engine/drive-train/wheels/etc. exists so that the truck can be mobile. Because let's be honest, nobody wants a truck that does not move.

The purpose of the a truck is to carry loads. Being able to hit 0-60 in 5.4 seconds is completely useless. My load fly out of my truck with that kind of speed and power. No. Ford, I'll show you a REAL truck.


Now THAT is a truck!